Back from an amazing time at Villa Domme in Tuscany June 21 2018
I have just arrived back this week from teaching a week at Villa Domme in Tuscany. The course was The Mysteries of Female Domination™ diploma course.
Attendees came from the Netherlands, UK, USA, Canada, Australia, Sweden and Australia, and we had an absolute blast. While I teach a number of courses in Australia, this was the first-time I've ever run an intensive week-long course and in such a spectacular location.
One of the ways this course differed from others I've taught, as well as the length, is that I aimed holistically to get transmit the essence of Female Domination from ancient sources, ritual, history, lifestyle D/s, the professional craft, and to attune the different psychologies of subjects who present to the Female Dominant. To encourage open conversations about interests and blocks to stepping into Dominance. I also had opportunity to share my new research on the ancient Goddess sex ritual for the second time ever, and developed further on when I first presented on it.
You'll see some of the attendees posted on Twitter during the course:
The course submissives were playfully (and sometimes more sternly) bossed around and punished, and used for practice. I ate my breakfast to the spectacular view of two Mistresses in fetish attire brandishing a single tail whip in front of the rose bushes. On the final day, all kinds of activities took place also outdoors, in this very unique setting, the nature of which I'm unable to go into - but trust me it was quite something.
Many on the course made life-long friendships, and have expressed a desire to come back again next year. The women, in case you're interested, came from diverse backgrounds and included one of New York's top Dominatrices, women involved in advanced sexuality education and practices, lifestyle Mistresses, and those keen to step into their dominance.
I have received emails from many of those who came, Mistresses and subs, reporting positive feedback and ways in which it's affected them.
All-in-all it was a delicious experience, and I must admit I am suffering Domme-drop from returning home after such an amazing time at Villa Domme in Tuscany.
Thank you to all those who were a part of the trip and made it so magical.
x Anne O Nomis
PS Yes I plan to run a course again next year in June 2019.
It will be limited to 16 people, as I feel that's the right amount for me to manage well and teach at such an event.
Last year in 2017, I wrote about the passing of slave david stein (spelt in lowercase, as he liked to be known), who co-developed the ethical framework acronym of SSC or Safe Sane Consensual, in 1983 in New York.
David was the last living member of the three member New York Gay Male S/M Activists (GMSMA) committee; Martin Berkenwald, Bob Gillespie and david stein - who published a committee report with the phrasing of Safe, Sane, Consensual. The members would have little idea at how influential those words would be come. As Stein would later reflect:
"Tens of thousands — maybe hundreds of thousands — of kinky men and women all over North America and around the world, many of whom have no idea what “GMSMA” stands for, know “Safe Sane Consensual” (SSC)."
Given the significance of the SSC (Safe Sane Consensual) code to BDSM, and the later challenge of RACK (Risk-Aware Consensual Kink), I thought I would devote a blog post to discussing these.
I'm writing more on this in my new book (Mistressery) in progress, but the need for this material seems required in the very "NOW", so I'm putting some of the resources online straight away.
I hope this may prove helpful...
Anne O Nomis
Author of 'The History & Arts of the Dominatrix'
SSC (Safe, Sane & Consensual)
Challenging pathology and abuse;
A Framework of Fireworks !
Safe, Sane and Consensual grew out of small gay S/M groups involved in education and activism, in 1980s Chicago and New York.
Gay S/M clubs experienced a small number of predatory so-called "Dominants", who might prey on the younger and/or new-to-the-scene attendees and push them into activities without the individual's full awareness of or agreeement to the activity or risks; without in other words informed consent. There were also people who had good ethics and concern for others, but their level of technical know-how in activities such as bondage and whipping may not match their level enthusiasm. At the same time, S/M play would often throw up emotionally complex responses which were aided by good communication and discussion.
The S/M community met these concerns with education, advocacy and discussion of ethics. Their members were also concerned with the image of gay S/M to the wider public, and the perception of S/M as being as psycho-pathological destructive or neurotically self-abusive behaviour.
In today's arguably more kink-friendly world, we may also forget that the term S/M had its roots in the German psychiatrist Richard von Kraft-Ebing's "Psychopathia Sexualis" in 1890. For much of 20th Century history, people who were into BDSM and kink activities were at risk of being viewed as pathological, psychologically damaged or as sexually deviant.
Above: Psychopathia Sexualis by Kraft-Ebing with portrait of author.
The legacy of psychiatric pathology tradition prevented S/M being seen for its erotic lifestyle potential - as activities and interaction towards pleasure, experimentation, excitement, fun and fulfilment between consenting adults.
The response of the gay S/M groups was to seek to build a community which would help advocate for education, communication between people, consent, and safe and sane play.
For the historical record, and because my blog seems to get found by a lot of scholars and journalists, I'm reproducing the original 1983 GMSMA newsletter wording as a historical resource:
"GMSMA is a not-for-profit organization of gay males in the New York City area who are seriously interested in safe, sane, and consensual S/M. Our purpose is to help create a more supportive S/M community for gay males, whether they desire a total lifestyle or an occasional adventure, whether they are just coming out into S/M or are long experienced.
Our regular meetings and other activities attempt to build a sense of community by exploring common feelings and concerns. We aim to raise awareness about issues of safety and responsibility, to recover elements of our tradition, and to disseminate the best available medical and technical information about S/M practices. We seek to establish a recognized political presence in the wider gay community in order to combat the prevailing stereotypes and misconceptions about S/M while working with others for the common goals of gay liberation."
Source: Emphasis my own. August 1983 report of that Gay Male S/M Activists committee; reproduced in david stein Safe, Sane and Consensual: The Making of a Shibboleth
Above: Gay Male S/M Activisits publication and logo on T-shirt
The original wording of the New York Gay S/M Committee newsletter is telling of the spirit in which the Safe, Sane, Consensual code came about.
The committee's chosen wording is very likely influenced by the familiar American exhortation around Independence Day fireworks; “Have a safe and sane Fourth of July.” Indeed david stein acknowledged this relationship in his own writing on how Safe, Sane and Consensual came about:
"Every year while i was growing up, i heard that phrase ("Have a safe and sane Fourth of July") on TV, or saw it in the newspapers and on billboards, and it stuck."
Left: Vintage Pin 'A Safe and Sane Fourth"; Right: Seal of State of California State Fire Marshall for Fireworks with "Safe and Sane" at its top.
Over in Chicago, the infamous Hellfire Club produced its statement of purpose for their club using "safe and sane" in 1980, predating New York's GMSMA committee newsletter.
The unsigned essay by Tony DeBlase for Chicago Hellfire Club’s Inferno 10 (1981) run book sets out Hellfire Club's stated purpose:
“. . . to provide education and opportunities for participation in S&M sex among consenting adult men and to foster communication among such individuals. Responsible S&M has become more popular and less feared in the gay community and Chicago Hellfire Club continues to serve its community — striving always to educate and promote safe and sane enjoyment of men by men." [Emphasis my own]
Above: Chicago's Hellfire Club in 1970s with John Preston in centre, and Tony DeBlase on right. Source: Leather Archives & Museum
From a historical point of view, did the New York Gay S/M activitists in fact emulate / copy / borrow or appropriate Chicago Hell Fire Club's wording of "safe and sane", to which the third term "consensual" was added? Or were the two groups independently borrowing from the 4th of July fireworks slogan?
Although slave david stein narrates a version in which they both happened to come to the same wording independently, I believe they (the GMSMA committee members) may have borrowed or taken up Hellfire Club's wording - whether it having been sewn into their subconscious from reading the Chicago material or interacting with its members mentioning "safe and sane", or whether more consciously referring to Hellfire's statement when developing their own.
Certainly david stein attended Hellfire Club, and wrote about his experience there. He posed as a model for bondage there. He viewed any and all writings and reports from the SM scene with a keen interest in ideals of S/M relationships.
In his own writing he acknowledges this possibility:
"Inferno 10 was the first i attended, and it made a big impression on me, so Tony’s [Tony deBlase's] words may have suggested the application of “safe and sane” to S/M, and even the association with “consensual.” But the GMSMA statement of purpose was the first place all three terms were jointly applied to S/M."
Like a lot of inventions, the origin is not as clear-cut and traceable to one individual as one might like. Both the Chicago and New York Gay SM scene in the early 1980s can claim a role in the use of the terms, and they evoked in people's minds the association with 4th of July phrase around fireworks.
Fireworks - exciting, special, exhilarating, fun, bright and colourful, powerful, explosive, magnificent but also potentially dangerous if not supervised with some caution - was an apt metaphor for S/M.
It made the motivations of S/M players more immediately understandable also: people who sought excitement, exhilaration and enjoyment in their sexual interactions.
As stein recounted,
As a kid, what i took “Have a safe and sane Fourth” to mean was, “Have a good time, but don’t be stupid and burn the house down or blow your hand off.” More than two decades later, that seemed to fit S/M just fine. What we meant by “safe and sane S/M” in 1983 was, “Have a good time, but keep your head and understand what you’re doing so you don’t end up dead or in the hospital — or send someone else there.”
How SSC came into popular usage
The Safe, Sane and Consensual slogan was solidified into BDSM history when it was used as the slogan for marches on Washington by the Lesbian and Gay Rights and the S/M-Leather-Fetish Contingent in March 1987 and March 1993.
The pre-march planning sessions had debated various options, as well as weighing up the pros and cons of Safe, Sane and Consensual, before deciding on it as the most effective slogan. Once agreed upon, it went out on the top of all newsletters and press releases, and gradually onto T-shirts and stickers. For the 1993 march, the effect was magnified. Safe, Sane and Consensual was emblazoned onto the S/M-Leather-Fetish Contingent's 20 foot banner, which hung the day previous across the grand entrance of the government building on Constitution Avenue, that hosted our huge S/M-Leather- Fetish Conference.
"Thousands of men and women from all over the U.S. and many foreign countries saw those three words, identified with them, and took them back to their local communities." (david stein)
Safe Sane Consensual came to define the S/M community as its code, its ethos. With benefit of hindsight, we can now see how significant this 1980s gay S/M movement was - and is - the to the BDSM scene today.
It was these activists and educators who were helping form ethical codes for BDSM players, to look after their members. They were writing and marching against prejudice and ignorance of towards their community and practices. Their legacy to the SM-leather-kink communities was considerable.
RACK - Risk-Aware Consensual Kink
A Framework of Risk Acknowledgment
Close to the turn of the millennium, a critique of Safe, Sane and Consensual was simmering amongst BDSM writers such as Laura Antoniou, Joseph W. Bean and Phil Julian. Whilst amongst community web messaging and forum boards, alternatives were being debated.
One of the challengers was Gary Switch, who would later develop the term RACK as Risk-Aware Consensual Kink - which would become the chief alternative slogan of the BDSM community.
Gary Switch requests his account to be reproduced in the whole:
During a discussion of SSC (Safe, Sane and Consensual) on the TES-Friends list on 11/25/99, I proposed RACK (Risk-Aware, Consensual Kink) as an alternative. Here's my motivation:
Nothing's perfectly safe. Crossing the street isn't perfectly safe. Remember that it's technically called "safer sex," not "safe sex." If we want to limit BDSM to what's safe, we can't do anything more extreme than flogging somebody with a wet noodle. Mountain climbers don't call their sport safe, for the simple reason that it isn't; risk is an essential part of the thrill. They handle it by identifying and minimizing the risk through study, training, technique, and practice. I believe that this approach will work better for us leatherfolk than claiming that what we do is safe. We want to foster the notion that we develop expertise, that to do what we do properly takes skill developed through a similar process of education, training, and practice.
Negotiation cannot be valid without foreknowledge of the possible risks involved in the activity being negotiated. "Risk-aware" means that both parties to a negotiation have studied the proposed activities, are informed about the risks involved, and agree how they intend to handle them. Hence "risk-aware" instead of "safe."
The "sane" part of SSC is very subjective. Who's making the call? Person A might think fisting is insane; persons B and C might enjoy it very much. "Sane" always reminds me of Pat Paulsen's campaign slogan from the old Smothers Brothers show: "Vote for Paulsen; he's not insane!" If you go around constantly reassuring folks that you're not crazy, they'll start to wonder.
I've heard "sane" interpreted as: "able to distinguish fantasy from reality" and "not intoxicated," which are both perfectly valid, though the latter is similar to the above -- you don't go around constantly reassuring folks that you're not drunk, either.
"Consensual" is the crux, implying negotiation which implies being able to distinguish fantasy from reality, as well as dealing responsibly with risk factors. If you don't know the risk factors, if you don't know what will happen in reality, then you don't know what you're consenting to. Meaningful negotiation must always take place on the common ground of consensus reality.
The "kink" part went in to make a snappy acronym and because SSC doesn't tell you what you should be SSC about. Safe, Sane, and Consensual trout fishing? Alluding to the rack, an archetypal torture instrument, has been criticized, but to me it signifies our transformation of atrocity into ecstasy, and admits that though we may enjoy some dark fantasies, we realize them harmlessly.
RACK is admittedly more confrontational than SSC. It's defiant, the same way the GLBT community uses "queer." RACK allows us the freedom to have non-PC fantasies. Don't a lot of us enjoy non- consensual fantasies, either from the top side or the bottom side? We enjoy them in our literature; we may very well enjoy them while we play. But we act them out responsibly and consensually.
(Reference source: Gary Switch, Contributing Editor, Prometheus magazine, GarySwitch@aol.com )
Gary's account is both articulate and understandable. It promotes quite a realist attitude towards BDSM with its inherent risks, and suggests that participants focus on identifying the risks in order that they can be discussed and play their role in consent and in risk management.
For many who enjoy more extreme forms of play, referred to as "Edgeplay", with higher elements of risk of harm, RACK provided them with a framework which emboldened their right and defence - to indulge in their preferred play.
Edgeplay is a kind of subjective term for anything that has significant risks and is regarded as more extreme activities in BDSM circles; from breathplay, to fireplay, to knives and cutting, to barebacking, and so on.
In practice, and in fetish clubs, I would often hear conversations that go something like this:
"Stop nannying us" - the Edgeplayers would say to the players admonishing them about dangerous play.
"Nothing's safe. We get that our kinks can be risky or dangerous, but so is life. It's our choice. This is how we get off. We're aware of the risks. We're educated. We know what we're doing. It's our life."
If SSC Safe, Sane and Consensual had a flavour of idealistic ethical romance about it, RACK Risk-Aware Consensual Kink was about realism of risk, individual responsibility and the right to choose to take risk for our kicks or kinks.
Both these acronyms of SSC and RACK are the most common batted around within the BDSM community and by individual players. As such, I hope this blog post will provide food for thought and a place of resources to access and refer to the original work. I've listed the most accessible and recent articles below.
Bibliography / Resources
* Richard von Kraft-Ebing (1890) Neue Forschungen auf dem Gebiet der Psychopathia sexualis ; translated in English as New Research in the Area of Psychopathology of Sex.
* david stein (2002) “Safe Sane Consensual”: The Making of a Shibboleth by slave david stein under the Guardianship of Master Steve of Butchmann’s. Published in 20th Anniversary issue, September/October 2002, of VASM Scene, the newsletter of Vancouver Activists in S/M of Vancouver, British Columbia. Viewable at: http://boybear.us/ssc.pdf
NB: An early draft was also presented at Leather Leadership Conference in Washington, D.C, in April 2000: www.leatherleadership.org. Other versions published in The Sandmutopia Guardian and later reworked for the Spring 2001 issue of NewsLink, the GMSMA newsletter.
* Gary Switch (c 2009) Rack Essay and Interview posted by author as Fetlife post: https://fetlife.com/users/53355/posts/25734 (Viewable only by Fetlife members)
Melbourne Dominatrix Diploma SOLD OUT & Sydney weekend course offered for first time March 4th - March 5th 2018 January 03 2018
Next week I am giving a talk on the Dominatrix history on 11th January at Passionfruit Sensuality Shop Upstairs Salon, 404 Bridge Road, Richmond, Melbourne.
The Dominatrix Diploma Seven Realm Arts course covering the foundational theory, psychology, practicum and arts of the Dominatrix begins on Saturday 13th January, and fortnightly for 8 lessons of 2 hours, taught over 16 weeks. It is fully sold-out again.
I absolutely love teaching at Passionfruit - which is such a fabulous sex positive space, with wonderful staff. I always feel so enthusiastic going in there to teach.
Women using sub as a foot rest, from Dominatrix Diploma class 2017.
It seems that a lot of the demand is coming from word-of-mouth of other women who have taken my previous courses and have loved it and recommended it to their friends. This year there are also some enrolees who heard me present at Oz Kink Fest in 2017.
SYDNEY COURSE - FIRST TIME EVER
I have received so many emails from women in other parts of Australia, that I have finally got my A into G ("arse into gear") to offer the Dominatrix Diploma course in Sydney. What has put me off earlier doing this is I felt it was cost-prohibitive to fly all the necessary equipment up to Sydney, fly myself up, heavy books up, arrange a venue suitable for teaching, arrange Powerpoint projector and screen, organize small equipment for all the students, and so on.
I have "dear tom" to thank for changing my view on all this. He is a retired production manager who has toured rock bands and circuses around the world, including putting on bands in Antarctica for multiple nations down there in obviously freezing conditions. So we have worked down a production schedule of what was involved, all the obstacles, and actually addressed each one.
A wonderful venue has been secured in central Sydney for me to teach in. Not a tacky badly-done fetish orientated venue, but an elegant upmarket apartment to which we are flying our equipment in in special roadcases. I've acquired 2 projectors and screen for my Powerpoint. I have hand-selected all the equipment I want each Dominatrix Diploma student to have to practice with - riding crop, flogger, shibari rope, safety shears, nipple clamps, blindfold and so on - all within a discreet roll-bag. And what do you know - it's all come together!
For Sydney, the venue could only accommodate a small number of people for the course, and I also want to keep the numbers down as it's going to be such an intensive course to deliver it over a weekend of 16 hours. (As I usually teach it over 8 lessons of 2 hours spread out fortnightly, in Melbourne.)
So for Sydney, I have capped the number of attendees at 7, given the size of the space.
As it is running on a weekend, from 10 am to 6 pm on Saturday 4th March and Sunday 5th March, this will enable women who are interested in the course from outside of Melbourne - to be able to do it in this one weekend intensive. And go away with all the foundational knowledge resources they need to practice the Dominatrix's arts.
Images of a submissive in a latex vac bed from the Seven Realm Arts course, 2017.
I find that the classes tend to be a mix of those with a lifestyle interest - who are curious, keen, exploratory and open-minded and wish to gain this special knowledge and confidence. Combined with women who have a professional aspiration to practice as a Dominatrix, be it that they have a background in sex work and courtesanerie, or have come from a completely "normal" vanilla background (such as in financial services, IT, etc), and want to become a pro-Domme. I also get the odd well-known professional Dominatrix wanting to do the course to expand her existing knowledge and practices, having read and enjoyed my book, and wanting to do in essence further professional development.
So it will be interesting to see if the Sydney course attracts a similar demographic of wonderful women, the same way the Melbourne course has run over the years that I've been teaching it.
I'm not sure if I will teach in Sydney again after this, due to the large production involved in running it away from "home turf". Only time will tell. But I am excited to be bring the course to Sydney and deliver the course as an intensive that will enable women from further afield to attend.
So to all my future students in Melbourne and Sydney (and Tuscany for June!), I look forward to meeting you all. I am honoured to be your teacher and pass on the baton of erotic wisdom.
There is further information about the Sydney Dominatrix Diploma 'Seven Realm Arts' course here: https://www.villadomme.com/sydney-course/
x Governess Anne O Nomis
Teaching in Tuscany - Villa Domme December 07 2017
Villa Domme 'The Mysteries of Female Dominance - Realm Arts™ course' in Tuscany, 9 - 16 June 2018.
In June 2018, I am teaching a course in the 'Mysteries of Female Domination - Realm Arts™ course' in Tuscany in Italy. I am naturally very excited about this.
I have been teaching a Dominatrix Seven Realm Arts course in Melbourne which runs over 8 fortnightly classes, which has been very popular and run repeatedly due to demand. However it's prohibitive for people to attend from overseas, due to the way it's spread out 16 weeks with fortnightly classes, and the geographical location of Melbourne Australia being very far to fly to from the UK and Europe.
Accordingly I have put together an intensive and immersive retreat style certificate course in domination, which runs over 7 days with accommodation on site in a Tuscan villa.
Within a month of announcing and offering this course, I've received bookings from female dominant women (and in some cases submissives) people in the Netherlands, UK, USA and Australia, who will all be flying over to attend.
Villa Domme has 10 bedrooms, of which 8 are now booked and confirmed, and the course is going ahead. There is still place for a couple more people to fill up the villa and course, if anyone who reads this blog entry has the desire to attend - I suggest you contact me promptly.
The course includes teaching in all the main areas of the Dominatrix's craft, which I conceptualized in my book as the "Seven Realm Arts" (Chapter V, 'The History & Arts of the Dominatrix'). This framework and my book has become the curriculum used by Mistress training in various places around the world.
I have been putting together domination literature through the ages, which elucidate the Dominatrix / Mistress in power and command, as well as the interplay with her subject - whether he be submissive, slave, servant, schoolboy, cross-dresser or other role / identity.
I will be taking the course participants on a day tour of the Uffizi in Florence taking in artwork on the theme of the "power of women" in art. This was a specific genre of Renaissance art, in which men are brought down by female allure and womanly wiles, and thus ripe for viewing and discussion.
In addition, I am keen to integrate material which has come from my new research on ancient Goddess rituals practised in the pre-Christian era. These includes preparation for the quršu - the "fucking ritual" quite literally translated from Akkadian, which included bathing and beautification rituals, setting up the bed with flowers and incense, sacred music and songs of desire, and the erotic coupling of the Goddess with the King-God, followed by a procession and revelry in which the community joined in the feasting and celebration.
These sacred rituals practised for three thousand years - offer insight into the ritual energetic of fuelling female desire and power.
I am also interested to expand on the notion of the sex Goddess as "Lady of the Largest Heart" as she was known in the literature. As a figure who attracted people of diverse sexual identities to her, with special roles offered within her cult, including for people of third gender, gender ambiguity, the cross-dressed / transformed and sex workers (or perhaps better put - sex specialists, in which the "kissing of the phallus" was one of their craft arts).
There is also evidence that the Goddess (likely played by her priestess) practised a "dance (or game) of domination" as part of her rituals. These practises appear to have been culturally transmitted to the cult of Artemis Orthia on Sparta, which although used upon the "ephebes" in a context of military training, in my view had their roots in sexuality and fertility rites. Aspects of mystery religions also included whipping, as seen in the wall fresco in the Villa of Mysteries in Pompeii.
The course includes accommodation in the villa, all breakfasts and lunches and dinner on 3 nights (with the remaining nights allowing some freedom to explore local restaurants or cook at the villa, with eateries and supermarket just a few minutes walk away). It also includes equipment needed for the course, and a mobile tool-kit of items which I have personally selected. And of course the art tour.
Full information is on the website https://www.villadomme.com/
For any inquiries relating to the course, you can contact me at firstname.lastname@example.org or contact email@example.com
RIP david stein - One of the original NY gay activists who helped develop SSC (Safe, Sane & Consensual) October 13 2017
Today I heard the sad news of the passing of David Stein. (Or, as I should write - slave david stein - in lowercase, as he would self-identify.)
As a BDSM historian I tilt my cap to david. (A leather police cap at that.) For david stein was one of the original NY gay male activists behind Safe, Sane & Consensual (SSC). I didn't know david stein personally. I was active in some of the same online groups as him, and we posted on each others' threads, including on BDSM history.
He began his interest in bondage at a young age, writing in his biography:
"Perhaps because i was granted too much freedom as a child and was largely ignored by both parents until i was of school age — i made an unconscious association between bondage (or any kind of restraint/constraint) and love. (It was only a few years ago that i realized this.) For me, to be bound is to be loved; to be confined is to be wanted."
Coming out in his late 20s, david abandoned a PhD Northwestern University in Illinois - with his thesis on the subject of truth, in order to step into his own truth. He moved to New York in 1977, worked as a volunteer for the National Gay Task Force (now the National Gay and Lesbian Task Force) and worked for Christopher Street magazine in its heydays. As well as writing on SM, he edited some of its star writers, including Edmund White.
Writing about his experience at Chicago Hellfire Club's infamous Inferno, he inadvertently ended up the bondage model illustrated on the cover of New York Native.
david stein as bondage model
In the era of Old School code of the leathermen, leather-wearing was "earned", and david sought to honour this by wearing denim when he attended Spike (bar) . When he finally did buy his first leather jacket, he succeeded in attracting a leatherman that same night, performing particular acts which he frankly discusses in his biography.
In 1980, he attended the first meeting of what became Gay Male S/M Activists (GMSMA). He served as Chairman of the steering committee, and held a number of positions over the years - including President and Program Chairman, editing the newsletter and publications.
As david stein would recount:
"GMSMA not only gave me opportunities to learn about s/m — it became the teaching outlet that my departure from academia had denied me, and i used every opportunity it afforded to spread information and ideas about safe, responsible bondage and s/m between consenting adults."
In 1983, the GMSMA committee which david sat on, published a report that contains the earliest use of the phrase Safe, Sane and Consensual in relation to SM activities.
Some eleven years after he began his involvement with GMSMA, he had to cut back due to a series of serious health concerns. These included arthritis in both knees, which as david noted was "a real handicap for a submissive bottom, let alone a slave", alongside a life-threatening bout of pneumonia. He ruptured two spinal discs in his neck from the coughing. The pneumonia he notes was not related to HIV. His distinction underplays the contextual events of the era, in which the gay scene was being ravaged by a then mysterious disease, which we now know as the AIDS epidemic.
Alongside writing in magazines, david began writing a story which would eventually be published as Carried Away: An S/M Romance - published in 2003 by Daedalus, as its first fiction title. He had several long-term positions as a "slave" within SM relationships.
Cover of Carried Away: An SM Romance by david stein
My understanding is that slave david stein - as he liked to be known - passed away yesterday morning, Thursday 12th October 2017, after a long battle with cancer. The news came through his leather family on Fetlife, from "slave kirk".
slave david stein will be best-remembered for his contribution to developing the BDSM code of "Safe, Sane and Consensual", and for his fictional ideal of slavery in Carried Away. However his body of writing and editing for the SM community in grassroots newsletters and magazines was considerable, and through this he had a role in influencing a whole community of people, with the ripples of the ideas he advanced still felt today.
He sought to live his truth, as a self-identified "slave", and to share the knowledge of S/M he had acquired with others, with generosity of exchange as well as self-introspection on consensual (voluntary) slavery.
slave david stein - thank you for your incredible contribution to the BDSM community.
you* will be remembered.
Anne O Nomis
Author of 'The History & Arts of the Dominatrix' book www.historyofthedominatrix.com
*I have used lower-case in keeping with david's own preferences of address, rather than grammatical error.
Articles for further reading:
david stein biography http://boybear.us/me.htm
david stein "Carried Away: An SM Romance": https://www.amazon.com/Carried-Away-Romance-david-stein/dp/0991048334
Presenting the new Education Salon October 10 2017
Amongst the furniture is an antique Georgian cabinet - full of interesting accoutrements. There's a custom-made steel spanking bench with padded adjustable top. (Just out of the camera frame.) A throne chair owned by Passionfruit Shop's owner Michelle which was a family heirloom takes pride of place in the corner. Within arm's reach is a copper pot with handle which has lap canes and other implements kept at hand. Across the floor is an antique Persian rug from the Shiraz region.
There's also a wonderful spanking bench by Michelle which is out of the frame of the photos and video. Some artwork is still to go up, along with flogger hooks and a few more flourishes, but the basic format of the Education Salon is established. A new generation of initiates will gain learning in an environment which honours the Dominatrix's history and craft.
I'm meanwhile onto planning for Villa Domme in Tuscany, where I'm teaching a week-long intensive retreat course on 'The Mysteries of Female Dominance' in a 19th Century villa owned by a Countess.
So you want to be kidnapped? September 21 2017
This weekend I have been invited to speak at Oz Kink Fest on the topic of kidnapping. Adult kidnapping as adrenaline experience enacting fantasy, I should clarify.
It's a subject I know intimately from the Game of Gambol, a secretive live action roleplay game, which integrates in and around (and with some respect for and consideration to) their "real lives".
So why would anyone want to be kidnapped?, some might ask.
There are several elements to it. For one, it's similar to any kind of adrenaline experience that people pay money to go through, just a little less mainstream. We don't bat an eyelid from people choosing to go on roller-coasters, or sky-diving. We know the popularity of horror and thriller movies. So on one level, kidnapping is a step-up in intensity of adrenaline experience.
In London, there are various experiences such as Escape Rooms, based at London Bridge and Angel, which is based on the Japanese Tagakism. ClueQuest (which has 9 escape rooms, and can accommodate 54 people), Archimdedes Inspiration, Escape London, Enigma Escape, and many more. These games are based on the notion of being locked in a room, invoking some adrenaline and fear, you are to find clues and solve puzzles, in order to escape within a set time window of usually 1 hour. Most are designed so that you succeed in finding the clues, solving the puzzles, escaping, and experience the rush of relief in release, and victory.
However comparatively, kidnapping varies in several senses. There is much more unknown. You don't escape, but rather are "released", and experience a far higher degree of vulnerability, entrapment and posited danger. You are taken-down by your kidnapper, overpowered, tied up or otherwise restrained, and held. Held physically and psychologically. You are not in a reassuringly controlled environment, subject to reasonable expectations on how things will operate and socially acceptable bounds of behaviour. Rather you are pulled away from security, from the safe law-abiding world you inhabit. You are taken away, into the unknown, at the mercy of and reliance upon your captor.
One of the well-known psychological aspects of kidnapping is what's known as Stockholm Syndrome - in which the captive forms a close bond with their abductor. This is absolutely an aspect of the kidnapping experience, and so closely overlaps the feelings which a submissive has towards a Dominatrix from BDSM session.
One of the most famous kidnapping bloggers, appropriately self-named as 'Mr Stockholm' writes:
"When a captive experiences unexpected kindness from their captor, an emotional bond can form. The result of this can range from a feeling of empathy to outright conversion to the captor's cause, but the chemistry is clear: being kidnapped can make you fall in love with your captor. The risks are palpable. If you now throw into the mix the tantalising possibility of being kidnapped by beautiful and powerful women as part of a fantasy that you've had a hand in creating then perhaps you can finally see the allure of abduction."
Thinking through the kidnapping experience, there is the risk-taking aspect to it, or as one participant describes - the insanity of it. In the sense that your are investing - paying - to be put into a situation of ultimate risk. Your body, well-being, and in the greatest extreme - your life - is in the hands of your captor.
The anticipation is enormous. The what, when, how...? There are various types of consensual kidnapping. In some, you go to a particular location at a particular time, where you are to be kidnapped from, but you don't know the how. In some, you know the broad timeframe and day, but not the exact location or time. At the most extreme end, is a kidnap in which you don't know when or where you will be kidnapped, having given all choice over to your kidnapper (who may for example have been given access to your diary and understand limitations around your work and family and so forth). Mr Stockholm describes these as static, semi-static and fluid kidnaps.
Alongside the enjoyment of fear, danger and thrill, there is something else, dangling at its depths. I was pondering this today, thinking more of the psychologies of the people who have come to me - seeking out such experiences.
I don't know that I have got it entirely succinct, but it is the pleasure of escape from one's "real" life. The purported force provides the excuse, the alibi. "I was kidnapped. This was done to me."
The kidnapping opens up a kind of parallel universe, one in which the victim is taken away from their life of responsibilities, their work pressures, their family life, the person they have to be - provider, professional role, family man - by obligation and expectation to everyone else. To be "taken away" is to be removed from all that responsibility, from the mundane everyday role.
There is too an aspect of being chosen, as select prey. In being wanted by the kidnapper, being subject to the beam of their gaze, their study and attentions. In order to kidnap you and hold you, your abductor inevitably inspects you, explores your sensitivities and psyche, your reactions.
The huntress plays with her prey, as a cat with her caught mouse.
Assuming the abductor is also a Dominatrix, skilled in the psychosexual realm, there is also an erotic frisson to the fear. She has the skills to adeptly torture, torment, tease, toy with her victim. To penetrate your mind - or indeed your body, by peg or point, to violate your normal boundaries of self in the context of a (consensual) adult kidnapping.
It is no surprise to me that alien kidnappings so often involve stories of being taken, up into a spaceship that represents a different (alien) world, and experiments which often involve anal probing or other such activities (which belong commonly in a Dominatrix's realm).
Forbidden pleasures (such as anal probing) are given excuse and raison d'etre (reason for being) by the kidnapping scenario. You were probed at the will of another.
And interestingly, it's also under the spell of another. For the psychology of subject and victim has them often go along with the will of their abductor as if in a magical spell, or a stupor of submission.
In consensual adult BDSM kidnappings, the abductee is given reason, excuse, to go along with will of his kidnapper. He experiences a break from his "real life" with erotic possibilities mingled with fear of the painful possibilities also. Can he withstand her treatment? What will she do with him? The experience is also very much one of psychological play and exchange, for in and through the experience, he learns more about himself, observed and tested and reflected through the eyes of another, whose attention and concentration is on him. The abductee also learns about his kidnapper, through her methodology of capture and treatment, the flavour of any questioning and interrogation, the activities they lead - which expose something of their motivations, give insight into her ideas and ideals. The kidnapper reveals part of themselves through their words and will. And the abductee studies these closely, for the risk posed to them, their safety and wellbeing are in the hands of their abductor. Understanding their kidnapper is the best shot they have at aiding their own security and being able to affect somehow their treatment and release. Kidnapping is in this way an intimate experience.
After the initial fear, anticipation and adrenaline rush, there is typically a reassuring safety in being held, by one who the consensual abductee has put his life over to in trust. This is I think one of the key differentiations of fantasy consensual abduction, is that the captor has wanted to be captured, to be taken away. He knows the stay will come to an end at some point, and he will return to his everyday life. But in the meantime he enjoys being held by her.
There is indeed something romantic about the scenario. As an archaeology major, I think of the story of Odysseus and Circe. She as a goddess, sorceress and enchantress. Living on an island - Aiolos - in a large house in a clearing of dense wood. The location is away from, separate and distant from the captive crew's home and their everyday lives. Her role is different from everyday women; she is magical, can make fierce animals docile, and turn men into swine through her sorcery. On the other hand, she is a weaver and a nurturer. Odysseus and crew are set free once she falls in love with Odysseus, but stay on her island for a year, feasting and drinking wine. She gives sound advice for the next part of his journey, which will end with him returning home, to his faithful wife.
Émile Lévy Circé (1889)
The role is in many ways akin to the Dominatrix, who herself is a kind of sorceress of the psycho-sexual realm. Arranging a kidnapping with a Dominatrix combines elements of fear, the unknown, of putting oneself in the hands of a powerful attractive woman, being held for a period by her, but ultimately being released and freed to return home. The period of take-down and captivity lingers on in the mind, is replayed and revisited in fantasy, and remains a ripe parallel universe. A portal in which one could have stayed, continued living with their captor, and maybe they even long for that on some level.
However the experience is something like the experience of a new place on holiday, and the come-down after as the person returns to earth with something of a thud.
Through the kidnapping experience the abductee briefly and for a period lives out a new identity, away from their everyday life. They are studied with intensity and probed by new eyes, seeing themselves in a new way, and gaining the intimacy of a new bond and relationship with their attractive captor - who has explored the responses of their body and mind, and knows them in some ways better than those closest to them.
The kidnappping experience is a victory of escape not from the claustrophobic locked room of Escape Room scenarios, but rather the claustrophobic room of real-life - that has felt locked and inescapable.
"Take me away, forcibly", is the request of the consensual abductee.
"With pleasure", is the answer of the Dominatrix abductor.
For a person walking into a Dominatrix's dungeon, their eyes are typically met with all manner of large-scale dungeon bondage equipment. Cages, Medical bench, St Andrew's Cross, spanking bench, and other such items. However one of the smaller pieces that most captivates the eyes and imagination is most certainly the violet ray machine.
This is the go-to apparatus frequently used for Dominatrix's (fantasy) interrogations and electro-play.
It makes a buzzing sound when switched on, with glass electrodes that glow with a surreal-looking violet purple (hence the name Violet Ray). When in use, they also spark across a small gap - seen most effectively if you hold the electrode with just a short gap from a sensitive body part!
They also make a very attractive item of display. Violet rays are housed in a little suitcase box, lined with fabric or velvet, with glass electrodes of different shapes (typically made of pyrex glass or soda lime glass), a cord attached to a phallic or cucumber-like handle (often made of bakelite), with a dial, and a power plug lead.
I have recently acquired a vintage c1930s era "Kosmosan I" Violet Ray device for the Education Salon, which featured a built-in vanity mirror likely aimed at female buyers. I was lucky to find a device in close to original condition, with all the original electrodes and manual (written in German) included. The cables and plugs have of course been replaced, as the original old cables were brittle and dangerous.
Anne O Nomis's "Kosmosan I" Violet Ray Wand for the Education Salon.
Original manual (in German) for the "Kosmosan I" Violet Ray Wand.
Different glass electrodes in the Violet Wand case.
And here's what one of the electrodes looks when attached to the handle and switched on, glowing its distinctive violet colour...
Violet ray 'comb' electrode when glowing violet.
The History of Violet Rays
Violet ray devices used to be manufactured in the thousands for medical / theraputic use known as "Electrotherapy". They were marketed to treat a range of medical ailments, with different shaped glass electrodes for purpose.
The technology was based upon the development of the Telsa coil, named after Nikola Telsa (1856-1943), a Serbian-American inventor, physicist, mechanical engineer and electrical engineer. Telsa's patents and theoretical work form the basis for the modern alternating current (AC) electric power supply systems.
The first prototypes were designed in the late 1800s, and introduced by Telsa at the World's Columbian Exposition in 1893.
Over in France, a physician and physicist Jacques-Arsene D'Arsonval was experimenting with the physiological effects of electrical stimulation. Together with his collaborator, Paul Marie Oudin, they would modify Tesla coil apparatus to create the "Oudin coil" (connected to an autotransformer), and experiment with its potential health benefits.
Wikicommons / Public domain image: Oudin coil being used for Electrotherapy treatment of a patient's knee, 1907. (From Roentgen Rays and Electro-Therapeutics, J.B. Lippincott Co., Philadelphia, USA, Page 168, Figure 67)
It was out of these technologies that violet rays were designed to be small boxed devices able to be used at home for theraputic use. They were meant to be beneficial to all kinds of medical ailments, from insomnia to asthma to catarrh to gout.
Above: Part of advertisement for Renulife Violet ray.
From the historic advertisements I could find, their marketing was designed to appeal to three areas: Beauty, Vitality and Health.
Above: Part of advertisement for Vi-Rex Violet Ray.
Violet ray with "comb" attachment in use in domestic setting. Advertised to arrest the progress of any scalp disorder and quality of the hair itself.
The violet ray devices were manufactured in large quantities in the early 20th Century, with many devices which survive today dating from the late 20s, 30s and post-WWII. In the USA, they were subject to numerous lawsuits and seizures, and in 1951 their manufacture was prohibited after a case directed at the last US manufacturer, Master Electric.
Their popularity in any case dwindled as claims for their health benefits were disputed. However vintage violet ray machines frequently popped up in flea markets, auctions and the like as a "novelty item". Their erotic use was well-enough known that they were experimented with in bedrooms (and dungeons) for decades beyond their manufacture.
Modern-day "Violet Wands" manufactured specifically for erotic electro-stimulation (known as e-stim) are sold in specialized sex stores and online in the contemporary era.
Science / nerdy stuff on how they work
Violet ray devices are high voltage, high frequency, low current, electric current.
The electrical control box controls the interrupter (set of contact breakers), a magneto coil and capacitor. Nick and Morphia note that when the violet ray is turned on, "you hear a buzzing sound - a noise made because the contact breakers are snapping open and shut around 55 times a second. It is when the contact breakers are open that the electrical circuit is cut off, and the energy stored in the coil oscillates between the coil and the capacitor at a much higher frequency."
I've read frequently that the wand handle contains a coil, but Nick and Morphia who recondition numerous wands, who I've met personally in London, and trust as a highly reliable source - write that the violet ray wand handle contains two coils:
"The first, a primary is made of thick copper wire and consists of ten or so turns around the high voltage coil underneath. The hv coil consists of 12 -15 layers of fine copper wire wound to a width of 3/4 inch - the rest is insulation.
This hv coil is like a transformer stepping up the voltage to between 30,000 and 50,000 volts and this flows out directly to a glass or metal attachment and applied to the subject. Thankfully the old established laws of energy conservation mean that current is significantly reduced as total energy remains the same (less losses such as heat)
The return end of the hv coil connects back to the mains to complete the electrical circuit - if it did not, it would not work. Interestingly it does so in one of several ways -
- Directly - in which case there is mostly a physical gap at the business end - usually mica - which isolates the user from the mains - but sometimes not - which is why you need to get any new acquisition checked out by an expert.
- Indirectly - two metal plates separated by a layer of mica - again to isolate from the mains - and normally buried in the outer layers of the coil
- Indirectly, layers of electrical insulation (most often Mica and waxed paper) between the primary and secondary coils - and can often be seen glowing in the dark
- Indirectly - via a capacitor - wax paper ones are not acceptable by modern standards
The effect of this high frequency high voltage current to to jump small gaps and to travel along the surface of a conductor rather than straight through it. This is useful because it means you cannot fry your innards or stop your heart from beating and makes the whole idea of using one of these devices - less scary. The muscles also tend not react to this high frequency oscillating current." (from Nick and Morphia site)
Violet ray with wand (at left), glass electrodes (top compartment & taken out at right side), dial (centre) and electric cord (bottom compartment).
How Violet Rays came to be used by Dominatrices in a BDSM context
I think Violet wands were ripe for use by Dominatrices for a number of reasons, which I'm going to argue for the first time here, based on my research on the history of the Dominatrix.
REASON 1) THE MEDICO-EROTIC SPECIALIZATION
Firstly, historical domination has long had an intersect with medical play and nurse roleplay. I could write an article separately on this subject alone.
Nursing is a common background for Dominatrices to come from. The famous mid 20th Century Dominatrix Monique Von Cleef was one of many Dominatrices whose background was medical nursing. (see p.145 onwards in 'The History & Arts of the Dominatrix' book.)
From the beginnings of electrotherapy, the erotic possibilities lay within their potential use. And indeed the design of the violet ray kits for private personal home use, and the devices and electrodes designed for the rectum and vagina (purportedly for health and vitality) were included in the kits.
The advertisements subtly allude to the erotic potential, cloaked in metaphors that engage the imagination:
"make very fibre of your body tingle with a new vim and vigour".
And elsewhere use the same specific vernacular used in association with the female complaints of nervousness and hysteria.
"Violet Rays have a soothing effect on the entire system - as a relief for exhaustion and nervousness they have no equal".
Above: Historic image of Violet Ray in use on the back.
So it is unsurprising that Dominatrices would be drawn to historic, vintage and quack medical devices - with many even having a medical bench or clinic set up in within their dungeon or as a separate room.
One of the Dominatrix's arts is the 'Art of the Bodily and Out-of-Body', utilizing techniques which emphasize the corporeal / bodily, and utilizing techniques to drive Out-of-Body experiences. (See Realm Art V in 'The History & Arts of the Dominatrix' book, pp.255). It is to this realm specialization that the Violet Ray device is aptly put to use.
REASON 2) DRAMA & MIND-FUCKERY
The Violet Ray machine looks to many like something that belongs in a stage performance or an historic interrogation.
The device buzzes, glows purple (particularly effective in a darkened room), and releases an ozone smell.
As such, these devices are ideal for "mind-fuckery" - playing with fear. For submissives unfamiliar with what these devices are, scared of what level of harm they might do, the Dominatrix's use of the device drives a hormonal cortisol fear response, alongside the psychological anxiety and acceptance of what will come with their application on the person.
One of the violet glowing electrodes from my Violet Ray set.
Violet ray devices are likely to have been part of the torture equipment used by wayward Chicago police commanders (including John Burge) in the 1970s and 1980s, for interrogating / torturing suspects.
In the 1985 court case, Leonard Hinton described being taken to the basement at Area Two... his hands were handcuffed above his head, his pants and shorts were pulled down, his ankles were handcuffed to a pole so his legs were spread, and then "the officer with the mustache and with the glasses with the black hair, he came in with a rod, and one was carrying a box, a black box. . . . There was a cord to the long rod. . . . The handle on it was black and they plugged the wire into the box. . . . Then they put something in my mouth . . . it was cloth . . . and they tied it so I couldn't holler. . . . Then they took the rod, long part, and they placed it under my genitals. . . . [It was] a pain out of this world. I couldn't describe it. . . . They said, 'Are you ready to talk yet?' The other said, 'I don't think he's ready to talk yet.' He hit me with it again. . . . Then . . . he touched it in the crack of my rectum. . . . Then he took that [cloth] out of my mouth. I said, 'I am ready to talk. Tell me what you want me to say, sir. Please stop."
One can imagine similar ways in which the Dominatrix puts the Violet Ray device to use for fantasy interrogation and torture play. The Violet Ray device having the ability to be able to be "dialled up" in intensity, literally by dialling the nob on the device to its highest setting. Or it can likewise be dialled down, and used for more sensory or teasing effect.
REASON 3) MISTRESS MAGPIE COLLECTORS
Dominatrices are consummate collectors. They love their Christian Louboutin shoes, their exquisite boned corsets, their rare smoked dragon canes and hand-crafted whips. Many have long 'Wishlists' of coveted items - to be bought and brought to them by their devoted slaves.
So it should be unsurprising that the Violet Ray should appeal to their magpie impulse. Bright - tick, shiny - tick. Beautiful objects within their own right, which are also held by major museum collections - tick.
Disclaimer note: If you are so inspired reading about these vintage devices that you decide to get one, please do ensure that it's really thoroughly checked-over by a qualified electrician or expert in these devices. It's very likely parts of it will need replacement, careful testing and regular servicing to ensure their safety.
Designing an Education Salon May 08 2017
Flagellation being carried out by an historic Governess, Library of Congress collection.
I am eager for the room to have a version of English Governess Theresa Berkley's 1828 design of a flogging frame, named 'The Berkley Horse' (or Berkley Chevalet). A high quality image of the device features in my book, 'The History & Arts of the Dominatrix', from the original print reproduced in 'Index Librorum Prohibitorum' by Pisanus Fraxi - the psuedonym of the 'Victorian erotomaniac' Henry Spencer Ashbee.
As far as I am aware, this will be the first Berkley Horse in Australia. I know of one other modern adaption of it in the world, in the collection of USA Dominatrix Irene Boss.
Left: Berkley Horse, designed by Theresa Berkley 1828. Right: USA Dominatrix Irene Boss's modern version of the Berkley Horse.
Melbourne is already blessed to have a number of devoted BDSM and kink spaces in existence, which speaks to the rich local scene. The suburb of Brunswick in Melbourne features Splinter Cell - a BDSM, Fetish and Alternative Education Center, Rope Bite and other events held at Pulse Studios, and Tantra Rope Bondage held at AKA Studio in East Brunswick. While other BDSM and kink events regularly feature in various hotels, bars and coffee houses in Collingwood and Melbourne city on any specified night, from munches and meet-ups, to events like Provocation. However such events are designed to best serve the more socially extrovert, lifestyle players and people who are 'out' in their kink interests.
The Education Salon is designed to cater to the desire for 1-on-1 lessons for women on how to dominate an intimate partner, rather than public play. Such is the strength of interest in BDSM and kink learning - driven by women, that the Education Salon is now to be set up for purpose. To which I am being given opportunity to apply my skills in design, history and education, to help create an Education Salon for women to learn.
I look forward to posting photographs of the in-progress or finished Education Room. Watch this space, as they say!
Oh and yes I welcome any historic equipment or contribution that anyone wishes to make to the Education Salon collection...
With thanks, Anne O Nomis.
Back when I was writing 'The History & Arts of the Dominatrix', I wanted to follow the history with a discussion of what it was that Dominatrices "do" with their clients.
Up until that point, the main manner in which to describe their activities was an alphabetical A-Z of each activity. This seemed not the best approach to me, so I instead attempted an ambitious project - or theorizing their activities as 'Seven Realm Arts'©. (To which I can now add a © "copyright")
I was in Hanoi, Vietnam when I was writing the book. I had journeyed there for three months with the express intention of finishing putting all the research and images on the Dominatrix's history together into a narrative. And I shall never forget the anxiety and concentration I felt on the week I began to write the chapter on the Dominatrices art, for I knew the Dominatrices themselves all over the world would read it and have their own interpretation. And, by way of context, many Dominatrices have degrees in psychology, or even PhDs in psychology. (It's become something of a cliché that Dominatrices end up becoming expert psychologists, Dr such-and-such under their real name, but having gained much of their experience and knowledge through domination.)
So... no pressure right? I'm writing about what a Dominatrix does for the academic and historical record in my book, which is going to be in essence - peer-reviewed by Dominatrices.
What I came up with was 'The Seven Realm Arts' which is Chapter V of my book:
Realm Art I - The Art of the Sublime & Powerful Woman
Realm Art II - The Art of lowering the man to submission
Realm Art III - The Art of bondage, entrapment and enclosure
Realm Art IV - The Art of discipline, training and punishment
Realm Art V - The Art of the bodily and the 'out-of-body'
Realm Art VI - The Art of cross-dressing and subversion
Realm Art VII - The Art of fetish and fantasy
This was my best attempt at a framework to theorize and describe what a Dominatrix 'does' in her dungeon or playspace.
I was rightfully very nervous when the book came out, as to how the Dominatrices themselves would receive this. Women who I had never met, who were highly intelligent, highly trained, many with very advanced educational and academic backgrounds.
Well they liked it. In fact they liked it so much that it's become the major curriculum book at most dungeons and Mistress training establishments around the world. And the interest of Dominatrix training centres is centred not merely on the history but specifically on that Chapter V - 'The Seven Realm Arts'© within 'The History & Arts of the Dominatrix'.
Governess Elizabeth (who I've never met or been acquainted with) has just recently written a blog entry on her website about my book, recommending it for her London Dominatrix School. And she describes my book as a "much beloved possession". Awww - bless. :)
Miss Couple who is Head Mistress of the world's oldest BDSM training chateau, La Domaine Esemar, located just out of New York, also utilizes the book for her Mistress training course. The structure of the Mistress training course has been developed from 'The Seven Realm Arts' structural understanding of BDSM (which Miss Couple has developed to her own needs for training).
I've also recently been contacted by Simone Justice in the USA, who trains Mistresses through her Dommecraft Mistress training school.
Above: Simone Justice of Dommecraft
While Chicago Mistress Simone (not the same Mistress as Simone Justice - they both just happen to share the first name Simone) also offers BDSM education and undertook the significant review 'The History & Arts of the Dominatrix'. (It was published on the major BDSM site in the USA, Leatherati.)
I can see I need to put together a future blog post on where people can do Mistress training around the world....
More great reviews of 'The History & Arts of the Dominatrix' January 21 2017
I keep belatedly hearing about online reviews of my book, referencing various people in the fetish community and professional Dominatrices.
So if you're wondering about the gap between when the review was written, I often only hear about them retrospectively.
- A Dominatrix reviews "The History & Arts of the Dominatrix" by Anne O Nomis (by Mistress Simone)
"For most of history, Anonymous was a woman" (Virginia Woolf) January 15 2017
In Virginia Woolf's 1929 essay, A Room of One's Own, Woolf noted,
"For most of history, Anonymous was a woman".
Her essay was based on a series of lectures delivered the previous year at Newnham College and Girton College - two women's colleges of the University of Cambridge, England.
The issue of anonymity - and pseudonymity (use of a pen name) - is a very relevant one in relation to my own work. I published The History & Arts of the Dominatrix under an author pseudonym of Anne O Nomis, a word-play on "Anonymous".
In doing so, I was following in a long history of female authors that chose to use a nom de plume - a pen name - rather than their "real" name.
Jane Austen is one of the most noteworthy of the 19th Century women to publish anonymously. Beginning with 'Sense and Sensibility' in 1811, with the cover page listing the author only as 'BY A LADY'.
The Brontë sisters, afraid of their work being judged differently it was revealed they were women, chose to use male pen names for their work, with a book of poems with the names Currer Bell, Ellis Bell and Acton Bell.
Charlotte Brontë published her works (including her well known novel Jane Eyre, 1847) under the psuedonym Currer Bell. Emily Brontë published Wuthering Heights (1847) under the name of Ellis Bell. While Anne Brontë wrote Agnes Gray (1847) and The Tenant of Wildfell Hall (1948) under the name Acton Bell.
For astute readers, their choice in pen name retained the same initials - C (Charlotte --> Currer), E (Emily -->Ellis) and A (Anne--> Acton), with their last name initial B (Brontë --> Bell).
Aside from the gender considerations behind the historical use of pen names, the other relevant driver of psuedonyms has historically been by authors writing on sex.
The Victorian Memoir of a man's sexual initiation was published as My Secret Life by Walter in around 1888 and reprinted repeatedly in subsequent years. The author's real identity is often ascribed as likely being Henry Spencer Ashbee, referred to as a Victorian gentleman and erotomaniac due to his extensive collection of erotica.
Henry Spencer Ashbee did certainly write Index Librorum Prohibitorum (Index of Forbidden Books) under a psuedonym of Pisanus Fraxi. This pen name was a conglomeration of "Fraxinus" (meaning Ash) and "Apis" (meaning Bee), so cleverly referring to Ashbee's surname. While the book is a bibliography of the erotic and "forbidden books" known to Ashbee, including a section entry on Flagellation.
Above: Frontispiece with illustrations of putti whipping (top) and burning books (centre), of Index Librorum Prohibitorum by Pisanus Fraxi. The name is the psuedonym used by Victorian erotomaniac Henry Spencer Ashbee.
Story of O, one of the most famous fictional works involving BDSM, was published in 1954 under the pen name Pauline Réage. Many people believed the book could only have been written by a man. However the writer's true identity and gender was not revealed until some four decades later. At an interview with a British journalist for The Observer in 1994, an 86-year-old intellectual called Dominique Aury acknowledged herself as the author of the book. That was not to be the end of the story of psuedonymity however. As Dominique Aury was itself a psuedonym, of Anne Cécile Desclos, born 23 September 1907 in Rochefort-sur-Mer, France. She died two years later, on 26 April 1998 (at age 90) in Paris, France.
The Intimate Adventures of a London Call Girl by Belle de Jour was published in 2005, based on her web diary blog of Summer 2003 to Autumn 2004. The pen name was taken from the famous French film 'Belle de Jour' starring Catherine Deneuve. Many journalists thought the blog was written by a man, with various names (of both sexes) put forward as the likely author. However when tabloid journalists finally did get onto the correct trail towards identifying and outing the real identity of the author, (tipped off it would seem by an ex-boyfriend,) the author beat them to the punch - outing herself, as Dr Brooke Magnanti.
My own choice to use a psuedonym was driven by concern to avoid limiting my job opportunities - due to the stigma attached to the dungeon apprenticeship, work and subject of the Dominatrix as a niche within sex work. Alongside the concern for my family coming from a small town, and media interest in reporting the book.
Dr Brooke Magnanti considers that once outed it has affected her not getting jobs within her field, due to stigma around her being a former call-girl and the publicity of her book, although it cannot be proved with certainty.
It's an issue on my mind as I am currently writing a second book within the field of sexuality. This time covering some three millennia of Goddesses of sexuality, their rituals, ancient sex songs and hymns, artwork and artifacts. My new book in progress crosses into material that will be controversial to fundamentalist Christians and Jews, in dealing with God's consort Asherah and biblical passages on Lady Wisdom and the foreign adulteress, and argues 'Song of Songs' as being derived from the tradition of ritual sex songs used in Goddess cults in the Middle East, Levant and Cyprus.
Some of my claims will rile some people, clashing with their beliefs and internal shame relating to sexuality and religion. However I feel it's an important contribution to make to the field of sexuality and history, and it's a history which is largely known only to archaeologists and ancient history scholars. I've recently had a baby daughter and cancer, and it's a book I want to complete and get out / birth into the world.
So whether to publish under my pen name or real name, there are pros and cons of each. And myriad concerns, for one's own livelihood, ability to work freely, safety, academic and social reputation, credibility, family to consider... it's not an easy decision.
Stuff Mom Never Told You - Feature on the Dominatrix October 08 2015
A podcast featured on 'Stuff Mom Never Told You' explores the Dominatrix, and does it very well. It's a 48 minute podcast with dialogue between Cristen and Caroline as part of Kink Week. They discuss the Dominatrix image in fashion, in photography from Man Ray, Helmut Newton, through to the history of the professional Dominatrix and what she does for her clients. (Length: 48 mins, 33 secs)
My research on the Dominatrix (from 'The History & Arts of the Dominatrix') is mentioned a number of times within the segment, including on erotic flagellation, along with that of other academics - including Danielle Lindemann.
You can listen to the Dominatrix podcast at: http://www.stuffmomnevertoldyou.com/podcasts/the-professional-dominatrix/
Book review on American website "Leatherati" January 13 2015
I was sitting in the library in Melbourne, Australia, when a review of 'The History & Arts of the Dominatrix' dropped live onto the the major American website 'Leatherati'. For those of you unfamiliar with Leatherati, it's one of the most significant websites in the USA for the BDSM community and "leather people" - a more inclusive term for the community which expanded from "leather men" of the mid-20th Century.
'The History & Arts of the Dominatrix' was reviewed by Mistress Simone, one of the USA's most well-respected Dominatrices and herself an author and writer.
To read the full book review of 'The History & Arts of the Dominatrix' at Leatherati go to:
La Domaine Esemar, World's oldest BDSM Training Chateau, USA
I am delighted to report that the world's oldest BDSM training chateau, La Domaine Esemar, has sought permission to use 'The History & Arts of the Dominatrix' as part of their curriculum for training Mistresses.
La Domaine Esemar was established nearly two decades ago, in 1993, by Master R. It has a reputation as one of the premier training establishments in the world. La Domaine Esemar is located around three hours drive from New York, and under an hour from Albany, in the foothills of the Berkshires. It takes 'MITs' (Masters-In-Training / Mistresses-In-Training) lengthy training - typically of a year or longer - to develop the arts of BDSM and hone their skills.
Of late years, Master R has been joined at La Domaine Esemar by a talented Mistress known as 'Miss Couple'. Her name reflects her identity as a 'walking dichotomy'.
Portrait of Master R and Miss Couple at La Domaine Esemar
Miss Couple has a degree in psychology and choreography, reflecting her many talents, and began her training at La Domaine Esemar in 2010. Her own journey took her from exploring submission to eventually qualifying as a professional trained Mistress. Now as Head Mistress of La Domaine Esemar, she passes on the batten of wisdom to others on their own journey, from a full 360 degree knowledge (having herself experienced the full circle of submission and domination).
Miss Couple has organized for the first time in 2015 to have a 'Weekend Intensive' of Mistress training, for those who wanting to expand their knowledge base of BDSM and learn Dominant skills. It will be run on January 23rd - January 25th, 2015 at La Domaine Esemar's training chateau.
'The History & Arts of the Dominatrix' books are being couriered over by DHL to La Domaine Esemar, forming part of the curriculum taught there for the course. Miss Couple shares my belief that getting to know the history of the Dominatrix helps understand the Dominatrix's role and her 'arts'. Indeed the 'Seven Realm Arts' section of my book will also form part of the framework for the training itself.
I plan to get over to La Domaine Esemar myself sometime in 2015, to see Miss Couple & Master R. In the meantime I send all my best wishes to them and the new Mistresses-in-training.
Mistresses practicing their arts, with 'The History & Arts of the Dominatrix' book now on the curriculum.
Author Anne O Nomis interview with Slutist USA December 18 2014
I was recently interviewed by journalist Coco Te Amo on my book 'The History & Arts of the Dominatrix'. Here I answer her questions on the impetus for the book, the notion of the Dominatrix's 'arts', the body politic, and the banning of the book by Chinese officials.
You can read the interview at Slutist: Tarting up the Body Politic in Shameless Fashion:
Author Talk in Melbourne Australia November 18 2014
Tel +61 3 9421 3391
Massad favourably reviews 'The History & Arts of the Dominatrix' October 31 2014
The International interest in 'The History & Arts of the Dominatrix' has been ongoing, and reviews coming in from across the world.
This last month, the famous Dutch fetish magazine, Massad featured a review of 'The History & Arts of the Dominatrix' (Volume 269; pp.70, 72). The magazine is edited by Bert Wibo - a legend in the Dutch and International fetish scene.
Some of the 20th Century underground fetish photographs of 'bizarre' ladies (as they were then known) were taken by Bert Wibo back in the 1970s. As I explained in my book, these magazine editors were networked into the underground scene, and the few surviving material which exist from the era, including archival photographs and accounts of the underground women who made their subversive career in domination.
It's an honour to hear that Bert Wibo - who holds some of the best knowledge in the world on the subject - has reviewed my book so favourably.
The History & Arts of the Dominatrix
Je weet, dat je "oud" wordt, wanneer in een boek over de Geschiedenis van de Meesteres jouw foto's met bronvermelding worden gebruikt en je door de auteur wordt bedankt in het nawoord. Anne O Nomis heeft de afgelopen jaren onderzoek verricht naar het fenomeen Meesteres en besloot daar een boek over te schrijven, waarbij ze alle facetten van dit beroep (of roeping) de revu laat passeren. Alles is uitgebreid onderzocht en onderbouwd en het resultaat is een heel lessbaar, soms ook heel herkenbaar boek geworden dat ook menig Nederlandse geinterresseerde liefhebber zal aanspreken.
De auteur gaat nader in op de persoon van een Meesteres, maar vertelt over de verschillen de technieken, haalt voorbeelden aan en is in haar beschrijvingen van de materie soms heel erg grafisch, zodat er weinig aan de fantasie wordt overgelaten. Het boek is te verkrijgen via Amazon.com of Amazon.co.uk...
Een absolute aanrader en leuk om met dit boek terug te gaan in tijd near Meesteressen zoals Kitty uit Rotterdam en Bea uit Amsterdam, of meer te lezen over de legendarische Monique von Cleef.
Roughly translated with the help of Google Translate (and I'll attempt to update and refine this when I can find someone who speaks Dutch!):
You know that you are "old", when your photos with source are used in a book about the history of the Mistress, and you thanked by the author in the afterword. Anne O Nomis has in recent years researched into the phenomenon of the Mistress out there, and decided to write a book about where she shows all facets of this profession (or calling) as it appears through history. All has been thorougly researched and evidence-based and the result of this is an easy-to-read and sometimes recognizable book that will appeal to the interested Dutch reader.
The author elaborates on the occupation of the Mistress, the different techniques, and cites examples in her descriptions of graphic subject matter, and little is left to the imagination. Her book is available from Amazon.com or Amazon.co.uk...
Highly recommended and fun to go with this book back in time to Mistresses such Kitty from Rotterdam, and Bea from Amsterdam, or read more about the legendary Monique von Cleef.
(From Massad Magazine, 2014, Vol 269, pp.70, 72)
Vintage polaroid of Monique Von Cleef in her 'House of Pain' in The Hague, signed by the famous Dominatrix herself - which she gifted to magazine editor David Jackson, included in my book along with images taken by Bert Wibo in Holland.
Dominatrix book banned in China - now a 'forbidden book' October 08 2014
Flag of the People's Republic of China
Book censorship has a long history in China. The First Emperor oversaw the burning of Confucian texts in 213 B.C. In the 20th Century, Chinese officials busied themselves with banning of books. In the 1960s and 70s, foreign books by J.D Salinger and Arthur Conan Doyle were banned books. Students reportedly resorted to hand-writing copies and binding them in string, to circulate them to their peers. [Source: Evan Osnos 'China's Censored World' in New York Times, May 2, 2014]
However in more recent times, the rules governing foreign titles in China were supposedly relaxed. This hasn't stopped 'The History & Arts of the Dominatrix' being confiscated by officials. Book orders sent out to buyers in China are simply not arriving. No notice is being served. No documentation is sent to buyers to let them know why their book has been confiscated. The book simply vanishes into thin air. Meanwhile a search on Amazon kindle in China comes up with the message: 没有找到任何与 "The History & Arts of the Dominatrix" 相关的商品
The book itself makes no criticism of China, nor even discusses China. So one can only guess that it's the topic - Dominant female sexuality, or discussing censorship in general within the book - that the Chinese authorities have taken exception to.
Archival photograph of Nazi burning of books, Berlin, 1933
They are of course not the first ideological regime to ban books. The Nazi regime banned books written by Jewish authors. The Catholic church had their 'Index Librorum Prohibitorum' (Index of Forbidden Books), which featured books deemed subversive to their ideology - by Galileo, Pascal, Rousseau, Victor Hugo, Immanuel Kant, Descartes, Voltaire, Casanova, Francis Bacon, Balzac, Emile Zola, Marquis de Sade, Madame de Stael, John Stuart Mill, Georges Sand, Martin Luther, John-Paul Satre, and through to the feminist author Simone de Beauvoir.
The Victorian author Henry Spencer Ashbee referenced in making his own bibliographic index of erotica in 1877 - under the pseudonym of Pisanus Fraxi. And indeed books dealing with sexuality have regularly drawn censorship.
Illustration showing books being burnt, referencing the Catholic Church's banning and burning of books
in illustration for Frontispiece of Pisanus Fraxi (Henry Spencer Ashbee) 'Index Librorum Prohibitorum' (1877)
John Cleland's 1748 book 'Memoirs of a Woman of Pleasure' (and better known as 'Fanny Hill') saw the author and publisher thrown into prison, and the book withdrawn from print. Copies circulated between friends and were sold 'under the counter'. Indeed due to the taboo of books dealing with topic such as sexuality and flagellation, book publishers would often publish very small runs, and circulate them by mail order to avoid scrutiny.
D.H Lawrence's 1928 book 'Lady Chatterley's Lover' was originally printed in Florence, and released only in censored form. While Penguin Books were tried in court in 1960 over their edition, under the Obscene Publications Act of 1959. Penguin were ultimately to win the trial, which examined the value of books "in the interests of science, literature, art or learning, or of other objects of general concern". The R v Penguin Books case was to usher in an era of more liberalization of publishing in the United Kingdom.
Forbidden books have subversively functioned for me as a list of books to be read! My own view on censorship of books features in page 112 of 'The History & Arts of the Dominatrix', and may be another reason the Chinese authorities banned my book. I write:
"In general, that which a person or institution bans, burns, locks away, censors or marks with a red ‘X’, they simultaneously mark as holding power. Those who most busy themselves in banning books and information, index their own belief system in torrent and contradiction at odds with reality. They censor what echoes with some kernel of truth, and with it an immense power, conflicting with or contradicting the ideology that they seek to impose – by force – on everyone else."
(Anne O Nomis 'The History & Arts of the Dominatrix' 2013 Mary Egan Publishing & Anna Nomis Ltd, UK, p.112)
Anne O Nomis 'The History & Arts of the Dominatrix' (2013)
Mary Egan Publishing & Anna Nomis Ltd, UK, ISBN 978-0-9927010-0-0
Russian intelligence meets the Dominatrix August 25 2014
It has apparently been garnering much interest and debate amongst Russian readers. (I unfortunately don't speak Russian, so am more or less in the dark until I meet up with a Russian friend in a few weeks time.)
Vintage image of Dominatrix Nicole de Carje, Herbertstrasse, Hamburg, Germany.
Adding to the foreign language interest, a review of 'The History & Arts of the Dominatrix' is also coming up in famous Dutch fetish magazine, Massad. In fact, some of the rare vintage photographs featured in the book were taken a long time ago by Massad editor, Bert Wibo. So I can only hope he was pleased with the resulting book. No doubt they would have brought up fond memories of Dominatrices long since retired or passed.
A German website is also undertaking a major review of the book. This is fitting as the book itself features snapshots in time and place of women working in the profession of female domination in the Hague during the 1970s, and the Herberstrasse in the early 1980s. I shall post the links as they all emerge in the next few months for those who speak Dutch and German. Watch this space.
'The History & Arts of the Dominatrix' has been ordered by acquisitions departments of major university libraries all over the world. There is a time-lag between their acquisition and cataloguing, however I will try and keep this list updated for students and academics who are wanting to access the book for their research.
Trinity College Library in Dublin
AVAILABLE FROM THE FOLLOWING LIBRARIES:
Georgetown University, Jospeh Mark Lauringer Memorial Library, Washington, DC 25007, USA - LAU Stacks, HQ79 .N655 2013
Library Journal Review:
'The History & Arts of the Dominatrix'
(Author) Nomis, Anne O
Elusive author Nomis sheds light on a mysterious underground world in this fascinating exploration of female dominatrices. Beginning with the ancient worship of dominatrix goddesses as early as 7400 BCE, she continues through secular domination practices in 17th- to 19th-century England (such as flogging houses), which were spurred by the rise of patriarchal monotheistic religions and schoolhouse corporal punishment. Nomis explains that the characteristic fetish "style" did not appear until the late 1950s, when the dominatrix herself truly carved out her niche as an erotic icon. She concludes with seven "realms" of the art of domination, discussing the nuanced dynamics of dominant/submissive relationships and fetishism in general. This book might not contain a slew of new observations for those well versed in sexuality studies, but the unconventional analysis reinvigorates even the most familiar concepts. It is obvious that Nomis dedicated years of research to compile an engaging, sympathetic history of a well-concealed subculture. The book provides exciting commentary on shifting attitudes toward sex, female power, and female sexuality across different time periods and regions, complete with dazzling visual aids and artifacts. VERDICT Recommended for collections with high demand for sociology and anthropology titles, particularly on the subjects of gender and sexuality.
(Review by Ashleigh Williams, Library JournalLibrary Journal Booksmack! LJXpress Prepub School Library Journal Horn Book Guide Horn Book Magazine Junior Library Guild)
The Nordic model & its threat to the the Dominatrix June 23 2014
'The History & Arts of the Dominatrix' was cited in an article in the New Statesman published on the 16th June:
The journalist behind the article, who writes under the name Margaret Corvid is herself a Dominatrix. She asked these questions of me in email correspondence:
Anne O Nomis (2014)
Anne O Nomis arrives back from Cyprus into London April 24 2014
As many of you will be aware, I have been off on an incredible adventure to Cyprus, where I have been undertaking research for my second book, 'Flight of the Goddess'. It covers the journey of the Goddess through millennia, and takes in artworks from the Middle East, Levant and Cyprus. Here are a few photographs from my field trip.
The Sanctuary of Aphrodite, Kouklia, in 'Old Paphos', which was looking very moody on my arrival.
The site of Amathous, near Limassol (Lemesos), Cyprus.
I am busy undertaking more research at the British Museum, and from a long list of publications, articles and books on the Goddess over long duration.
Meanwhile 'The History & Arts of the Dominatrix' books are journeying off all over the world. I find it very fascinating to see such a diverse range of countries where my book babies are finding new homes, in libraries and dungeons.
As well as being able to order via my website, the book is also available in select erotic boutiques:
Stockroom (USA), 2809½ West Sunset Boulevard, Los Angeles, CA 90026, USA.
Coco de Mer (UK), 23 Monmouth Street, Covent Garden, WC2H 9DD, London, UK.
So for those who prefer to check out a book before buying, you have the opportunity to go into a store and see the book in person. I am hoping also to give a salon talk on the history of the Dominatrix at Coco de Mer in Covent Garden while I am back in London. I will keep you all posted!
x Anne O Nomis
Limited edition available in the USA from Stockroom March 13 2014
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